In today’s video I share with you how to shift your identity into becoming who you truly want to be.
After having coached over 500 clients, there’s a recurring pattern I see.
Everyone who embarks on this journey to becoming their best self, does so because they would like to accomplish a particular goal.
However, the discernment of whether or not the goal is really desired, or simply seen as a “trophy”, is quite off.
See most pursue their goals because they think they should want something.
They think they should want money.
They think they should want the relationship.
After all it’s what society teaches us, right?
However, deep down everyone has their own unique desire.
According to this desire, the identity must be formed, not the other way around.
There’s another big pitfall most fall into, which is also what I’ll cover!
So here’s what I discuss:
Hope this was helpful!
Leave me a comment below with your thoughts?
Quasi hit. And in today’s video, I want to share with you how you can really make use of identity shifting and becoming a completely new person. And what I want to do in this video is clarify up the concept of acting as if, and learn how to properly use it so that you’re not getting stuck so that you’re not getting into this internal conflict of, oh, this is me and this isn’t me. And you actually frictionlessly effortlessly get to becoming your ideal. You right now, please stick around to the very end of this video, because by the end, I’m going to share with you three key so that you can implement this right now.
So before I go ahead and get started with this video and to quickly announce that I made a brand new bootcamp for you, as well as you can now get exclusive access to our email list where I can share stuff that I can’t really share on the channel because of YouTube limitation in order to get access to that, just go to the pin comments or in the description section, there’ll be a link to that. You can click on it. You go to a new page, you put your first name and your email and I just send and you’re in. So with that, let’s go right ahead and get started today. I want to talk about my favorite topic, identity shifting and how you can become a new person. And as you know, as you probably follow this channel, I’ve found out that in order to really make a shift in your life and what you’re seeing externally, it has to first begin internally, okay, you’ve got to change who you are.
And if you don’t change who you are, if you keep operating from that old place of being, even though you might see temporary changes with the tactics and strategies, you try over time, your behaviors and everything that causes those. You know, your actions are going to be influenced by this current self and how you think and how you feel on a predominant basis. So my whole life’s work has been on learning to become who I want to become. Okay. That’s congruent with my desires and that’s what I share in this channel. That’s what I’ve worked with over five, 600 clients now helping them achieve this same transformation. So I hope this is really valuable for you. So let’s begin with the biggest problem. Most people believe that pretending to be someone else doesn’t work. Okay. And now you’re probably going to get triggered by this, but I’m going to explain what I mean by that.
So most belief that pretending to be someone else doesn’t work. And this is because they believe that there is one true me and one true, not me. Okay. This brings me to the argument of nature versus nurture, going to write that down nature versus nurture. Now a famous man once said this quote. He said, if you’re born poor, it’s not your fault, but if you die poor, then it’s your fault, right? And that kind of got me thinking and understanding that if this is true, if I assume this to be true, then that means I can change my circumstances. And if I can change circumstances, I can nurture myself into becoming someone different, maybe not entirely different, but I think you can still do enough so that I can go ahead and achieve my goals and live the life that I want to live. But most people are more towards this nature side.
They believe in this fate that are, I’m supposed to be this way and I’m not supposed to be that way. I’m supposed to be introverted, not extroverted or extroverted, not introverted. Um, you know, I’m just supposed to be like this. My whole life is doomed because I want something else. And I can’t have that because I’m like this, right? And that’s what people suffer from because they, their beliefs start to get in their ways, their desires are not congruent with their beliefs and we’ll get right to that. So to give you a very good example of this, I used to believe that I was extroverted when I started on this journey and trying to start up my business. I couldn’t sit in a room for like three hours. I just couldn’t, I couldn’t sit in a room alone for three hours. I would have to go out and socialize and be with people.
And that’s because I had trained myself to be so extroverted to network a lot in college. So it was very difficult for me to focus. And I truly started to believe I had ADHD, right? The only time I could focus was when I was studying for an exam, but I couldn’t focus at all on starting up a business. And, you know, I would sit down and try to work like 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 hours straight. And it just wouldn’t work. I wouldn’t be able to focus. All I could think about was going out and meeting people. And then I started to believe that maybe I’m just an extrovert. Maybe I’m just this way and I can never be that way, but now I’ve become more introverted. Now I can sit down and focus for prolonged periods of time and it’s problem for me. Right? And I’m now I have a hard time socializing because I’ve been introverted for so long.
So now I have to tap back into that muscle. So do you see what I’m trying to get to? I’ve trained myself to become this and I’ve trained myself to become this by pretending that I can be this person who can sit down and we can focus for prolonged periods of time and build something as opposed to just being all over the place and shouting all over the place. Right? So this brings me to the next point. How can you become someone different? Like how do you end that internal conflict of, oh, that’s just not me. Well, obviously, maybe my nature is that I’m extroverted because I still need to talk to people, meet people. And yeah, that’s how I get energized. After a long day of work, I still like to go out and socialize and I don’t need to do it as much as I needed to in the past, but I still need to do it.
So maybe that’s my nature, but I’ve nurtured it to the point that I, I would like to do. You see what I mean? Well, I’ve conditioned myself. I’ve trained myself. I become this successful business owner. And in my mind, this successful business owner focus for prolonged periods of time. So then before it is possible for you to nurture yourself the way you’d like, even though you might still retain qualities of your fundamental that you were born with right now, the next point I want to talk about is how you can be this other person. So please understand this. You can’t just go around and wave your wand around and be like, I want to be that person now. And I want to be this person now. And just like, keep, you know, shifting into different people. It’s going to get real confusing for your psyche.
And it’s going to be very difficult to do, right? You can’t really have what you like. You can have what you truly want. Okay? As long as you truly, as long as you deep down desire something, then you can have it. If it was truly meant to be yours, then you can have it. So in this sense, if you desire something and you see that you need to become a certain other person in order to achieve that a certain different version of you to achieve that, then you can become that self. Do you see what I mean? You can’t, you know, so to give you a concrete example of this, maybe you think that you want to promotion at a job. So you try to be the person who gets that promotion, but it’s not what you really deep down one. It’s what you’ve been conditioned to want by society, by things that you’ve seen around you, but it’s not truly yours.
Your heart doesn’t really want it. Then it will be immensely difficult, much more difficult to be that person. Then for example, let’s say you want to be a business owner. That’s something you wanted. You wanted that freedom, right? Then it will be easier for you to become a business owner than the, than to become like a person who gets a promotion at the job, right? Even though the formal might seem more difficult, that’s because your heart is fully in it. As long as your heart is fully in something, it becomes much more easier to get to that. So to give you a more concrete example of this, I always wanted to have that financial freedom become that business owner and not be stuck at some job and feel like my time is being controlled and don’t get me wrong. Some people like that, right? Some people don’t view it that way, the way that I do I’m, I’m listing all the negatives to you.
Some people like to belong to a community to a, to a workplace. I didn’t like that. Right? So I always visualize myself being in that final destination where I have that freedom and I truly designed it. So it was easier for me to become that business owner than it was for me to try and become someone who gets a job and gets promoted to being a CEO. Right? So this is what was meant for me. And because it was meant for me, it was easier for me to become someone else go from that extrovert itself to becoming slightly more introverted, more focused, more inwards, turning more inwards. Okay. So you can be who you want as long as you truly deep down desire with your hot. Okay. Remember that. And now for the last point, which is what people don’t understand is that when you start to, you know, think about something over time, that thought instills itself, the more you entertain that thought, right?
But it doesn’t happen immediately. If you start to listen to a song over and over again, over time, that song will start repeating in your head. If you play a sport for long enough, like let’s say golf, you start to play golf, your swing. Won’t be perfect. At first, at first it will be very uncomfortable, right? It’ll be like, what is this? This is weird swinging this. And it’s not working, but over time as you keep doing it enough, then it’ll become a part of you. You won’t even think about it kind of like riding a bike. You won’t even think about it. It’s it becomes so natural become so subconscious, right? It gets ingrained in your subconscious, just like that, who you pretend to be is who you will become. Okay. So at first it might feel like you’re pretending and you’re trying really hard, just like I did when I wanted to become that successful business owner and lock myself in there, or, you know, even real back in the past when I want it to become more.
So my journey went like this. I went from introverted to extroverted, to introverted, right? So I started off introverted because I was afraid and I was kind of shy and timid. I didn’t want to meet people, but then I realized I need social skills. So then I became that person who was extroverted and had social skills. And it was very difficult for me to do that too. Right. It was difficult for me to become more confident, but then once I became that, it was difficult for me to go back to the introvert itself. So at different stages in my life, I needed to become a different person in order to learn these lessons, to be able to impart them to you. Right? So at first I started to pretend to be someone that I’m not right. And I only call it pretend because I believe right now that I am a certain person and I am not a certain other person, please see this. So that’s why you say that, ah, you know, I’m pretending to be someone that I’m not, but ultimately who you pretend to be is who you become, just like with the golf, just like with the bicycle at first, it’s difficult, it’s unconscious, but over time it becomes a part of you. So now I want to share with you three keys to really make this effortless for you. Three subtle tweaks that you need to make. So please, please make sure you pay close attention to this because it’s going to be a game changer for you.
Okay. So key number one, ensure that your chosen identity is congruent with your vision, right? So ensure chosen identity is congruent with your vision. I hope you can read this right now. Why I say this is because it goes back to my original point of if you truly desire it, you can become who you need to be. What’s who’s necessary for you to achieve that. Just like I did with my business, just like I did when I wanted to have a social life and experience that aspect of my life. So obviously the key part here is that you got to get clear on your vision first. Like, what do you really want, what your heart really wants? And I found that out when I saw that I was just getting joy from making YouTube videos and sharing my knowledge and seeing other people level up, right.
That was intrinsically motivating to me. And I’m going to make another video about that just off to this, but understand that you’ve got to make sure that this identity is congruent with your vision. If it’s incongruent, then you know, it won’t work and it can only be congruent. If you get clear on your vision, you have to take some time to reflect, to see what do you want 10 years from now, five years from now a year from now? You know, if you get clear on these three milestones, you will be pretty good. So that’s number one. Number two, you’ve got to operate from the, the ideal self, which is that chosen identity operate from ideal self. What does this mean? Well, as you go about your day to day and you are presented with obstacles or decisions that you need to make, how would quasi 2.0 deal with this?
How would quasi 2.0, respond to this? Right? How would quasi 2.0, communicate with his team? How would quasi 2.0, solve this problem? Right. So every single challenge that you face, every thing around you, you know, how would this ideal self show up? And when you show up as your ideal self, guess what your reality starts to catch up because your reality reflects your external world reflects your internal world, just with a slight delay, right? So over time, your external world starts to reflect this as well. That’s number two. And honestly, this is one of the most important points that people forget about. It’s easy to forget that because you operate from your current self. It’s like, okay, I’m this quasi now, how would I react to this? Go and react instead of taking a moment to pause and respond, right? Okay. Do I want to respond to this as my common self?
Or do I want to respond to this as my ideal self, ask yourself that that’s number two. Number three. Pretend if you call want, if you find that it feels way too unnatural for you to, you know, act as a successful sales person, because you’re way too introverted, or, you know, it feels like you’re huffing and puffing your chest to try and be someone you’re not, you know, you’re trying to fake confidence or you’re trying to fake something. You’ve got to pretend with intent to become, because please remember, but who you pretend to be is who you will ultimately become over time. As you keep pretending over and over and over again, it becomes a part of you. You become that person. You become the person that’s good with women or good with men. You become the person. That’s more confident in social settings.
You become the person. Who’s more of a leader to their team. All these things happen as you start to pretend. And by pretending, I mean, almost take on a character in a movie or something like choose some character that you look up to and almost pretend to be that character, right? Yeah. It doesn’t have to be like a literal one. You can create this character the way that you want. Right. You can even go ahead and write out a script of what a certain scenario or certain different scenarios would look like if you were your ideal self. But the key part here that most people miss out on is you’ve got to, and with the intent to become most people pretend for pretending sake. Okay? Okay. If you pretend for pretending sake, you’re naturally going to give up, there’s going to be no motivation to keep on pretending, but as you do it, as you act as if over time, it becomes a part of you and then acting as if it turns into being as if so with that, I conclude this video.
I sincerely hope this was helpful. Let’s do a quick recap of what we talked about in this video today, we talked about identity shifting how to truly and accurately we become who you want to be and eliminate that internal conflict of this is me. That’s not me. It’s so hard to become this. It’s so hard to become that. And that’s because most people have this false premise of there is one true me, and that’s not me. This is me. There’s 24 year old brown male. And as a 24 year old brown male, I don’t do that. And I don’t do this. So you close yourself off to other facets of life. And that’s because of too much leaning on nature, as opposed to submitting, to nurture the process of nurturing. So you are born with certain characteristics, perhaps you’re certain, there’s certain comic tendencies, but there’s no way. There’s no reason why you can’t push your karma out in the direction that you would like, which is what we do with nurture, right? You probably got shaped by your environment, like 80% of it.
So how I did this was when I went from being introverted to extroverted, back to being introverted and how you can become the person you are truly meant. B is if you truly desire that goal that you have set in mind, if you just go ahead and try to get to a goal that you think you want, maybe you think you want a job promotion because your parents have been telling you that you should get promoted at this job. Then becoming the person who is worthy of the job promotion, it’s going to be really difficult. But as opposed to that, maybe you want to be an artist. And that’s what you truly desire. If that’s what you truly desire, and it sets your heart on fire, then it’s going to be easier for you to become the artist, then the job promotion person, right? And finally, who you pretend to be is who you will become at first, it’s difficult at first, it feels uncomfortable.
That’s natural. You’re expanding your comfort zone. You’re trying out new, but over time it becomes a part of you, right? That’s number three. And the three keys for you to begin implementing this right now is number one, ensure that your chosen identity is congruent with your vision. We discussed that. We said how you got to make sure that you’re first clear on the vision, 10 years, five years, one year, what does that look like? What do I really, really want? What would set my heart on fire? What would make my life look like a vacation? Number two, operate from the ideal self. Meaning every single day, as you’re faced with situations obstacles, what would the ideal self do? What would the quasi 2.0, who achieves all of these things effortlessly? What would that person do? How would that person react or respond? Come from that place.
And number three, pretended to be with the intent to become and when, and the intended to become is there. And it’s coupled with the action of pretending to be, then that action will lead you to becoming. So with that, I conclude this video. Thank you so much for watching. I sincerely hope this was helpful. Leave me a common, letting me know what you thought of this. Um, if you want me to make more videos like this, anything else you would like to see on the channel? I love to hear what you guys think. And also if you’re new to the channel, make sure you like comment, subscribe, hit that little bell there. So you’re notified of any new video that I put out. And I’m super excited to announce that you can apply for the reality marshal program for close mentorship. With me, who we typically work with are people who are business owners and entrepreneurs who want to scale their businesses to the next level.
And they have all of the tactics and strategies, but the problem is the tactics and strategies on yielding the results that they want to see. They’re stuck at the same revenue level month after month, they ride the revenue roller coaster one month. It’s good, one month it’s bad. And what they’re truly seeing is that the problem is internal they’re too reactive. One month, they feel excited the next month they don’t and their internal state has been reflected into their businesses, right? Their personal problems, their lack of confidence, their inability to stick with decisions and really just get clear on what they truly want. That’s causing them to have this fluctuation and suffer. That sounds like you please click on the link of the description below to apply, and let’s see if we can work together and we can help you out. Uh, the free Facebook group is open for you to take advantage off the link for that is also in the description. Guys. Thank you so much for watching Tenex slang.
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