Stop Judging Yourself & Own Your Dark Side (What They Won’t Tell You)

Quazi (00:00):

Quazi here. And in today’s video, I want to share with you how you can stop judging yourself and why you really must learn to own your dark side. If you want to be successful, not just in business, but in any single area of your life. Please stick around to the very end of this video, because I’m going to keep this as short as possible. But also I’m going to share with you the biggest epiphany that I just had recently. That’s made a huge shift to how I approach my business and how I approach every single area of my life. And before I begin this video to quickly announce that I made a brand new bootcamp for you. If you scroll down to the pin comments down in the comment section below, you’ll be able to get access to our exclusive bootcamp, which I really can’t share on the channel as well as other bonuses, because you’ll be getting direct access to our email list.

Quazi (00:47):

So without further delay, let’s go right ahead and get started with this video. So what motivated this video was this book. I was rereading recently it’s by Tim Grover, it’s called relentless. And Tim Grover is this athlete or a personal trainer for athletes for like very, very elite athletes like Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant. And he shares his findings on what actually makes the greatest athletes succeed. What sets the top 1% of the 1% and what makes them stay hungry and keep going at it. Even after they’ve won so many trophies and I’ve realized in my life, you know, recently I’ve been struggling with this challenge of upgrading my program. So, uh, for the past six, seven months or so, I’ve been working on recreating our program and making it even better. And I’ve seen that, you know, I’ve been struggling a lot with this and mostly with hesitation and doubt because the program is already so good and customers are getting such great results already.

Quazi (01:47):

How do I improve it? How do I make it even better? And this daunting task made me get in my head even more. But I also realized that this moment of hesitation and doubt has always been there and it’s always crept up, but I’ve been able to deal with it better and just, you know, took the risk anyways. And when I did, you know, take those risks and just go ahead and put myself in those uncomfortable situations, whether this be in, you know, trying out a new experiment in my business, not knowing what would happen. That’s when I actually came out successful. When I put myself out of my comfort zone, that’s when I actually became successful with whatever experiment I was trying. So this led me to this epiphany that, you know, we are constantly judging ourselves and trying to make ourselves perfect. We’re trying not to say the wrong thing.

Quazi (02:32):

You know, we’re always walking on eggshells trying to say the right thing, not to offend someone, you know, nowadays online, it’s just a slew of opinions out there. Everyone is offended. You can say the wrong thing. You know, you might just hurt someone. And this makes us retreat more and be more guarded and not be able to freely express ourselves and do the things that we want to do. And so in this way, I realized this video is going to be controversial, but within every single one of us, there is this dark side where we just don’t give a. You know, we just don’t give a. We’ll just go out and do what we want to do. But most of us aren’t owning it nowadays, right? So most people nowadays, they fail to achieve their goals because of this cognitive dissonance that we have.

Quazi (03:16):

We want something, but we believe that it’s not right to want it. So ask yourself this, if you’re a business owner, right, maybe you want to make money, but then in your mind, you’re like, oh, I want to make money, but I don’t believe it’s right to want money. How many times have you had this thought? I know I have. I know that I was suppressing myself. When I had this store, I wanted to make money. I wanted to experience wealth and have that kind of financial freedom to be able to do what I wanted to do. But then within me, I was like, oh, it’s, it’s bad to want money. Rich people are evil, you know, they’re greedy. And you know, they just chase money. And, uh, you know, this kind of opinion, this kind of worldview was instilled within me when I started watching TV and, you know, just being accustomed to society and looking around me, uh, what other people were saying about rich people.

Quazi (04:06):

And I realized that this is what people said to themselves to be okay with being poor. Right? So poor people kept telling themselves these excuses of, oh, you know, it’s okay to be, it’s much better to be poor than to be rich, richer, evil, just to be okay and justify themselves being in their comfort zones. And so I was telling myself this story too, so that I could be comfortable and justify my failures. But as soon as I realized that as I was growing and maturing in my spiritual journey, and I realized that these were the excuses that I were making to stay where I am. That’s when I snapped out of it and started to face the music and took responsibility for, I am like, you’re poor and you’re not succeeding at what you want to because these are the excuses that you make for yourself.

Quazi (04:50):

So like this, every single day, they’re, they’re these excuses that we have, that we don’t own, that we don’t take responsibility for just like that. You have this dark side that keeps coming up yet and you call it your dark side because you have all of these desires and wishes, but you believe that it’s wrong to want it. Or you believe that you won’t be able to achieve it just like with money, right? You’re like, oh, I want all of this money, but you know what, it’s only for the gifted, it’s only for the people who are born with this kind of wealth are born with that kind of talent and all the, all the excuses that we keep making for ourselves. So the point that I’m really trying to make with this is there are these two sides of us at any given time.

Quazi (05:29):

And what we do is because we don’t either believe that we can achieve it, or we believe that it’s wrong to want it. We suppress this other side of ourselves. And when we suppress, when we push this other side of ourselves down and we don’t live in accordance with our true desires. So think about it like this, you have this real core desire right now, whatever it is, good or bad, but then there’s what you think you should want. Okay? Most people think that they should want something. You’re like, oh, why don’t I sometimes it’s the other way around. People don’t want something, but then they force themselves to want it because they think it’s a right to want it. For example, people think that they should want to, you know, make money and have a career when they really want to be an artist.

Quazi (06:15):

You know, they, they could care less about money. They want to be an artist and they want to express themselves and put their work out there and be recognized and be famous for it. But then they judge themselves and thinking, oh, no, I shouldn’t want this. The fact that I want, this means that I’m bad. And I need validation. And I have some sort of childhood problem that needs to be covered up instead of owning our insecurities and our failures and our mistakes. What we do is we justify them and we suppress them. And when you suppress them, guess what happens? They come up later on in life, right later on in life. They express themselves in a way that’s uncontrollable to you. And if you look at, or some of these athletes who get involved in all of these scandals, what happens to them is that Dockside starts owning them because they keep suppressing and repressing it.

Quazi (07:02):

They don’t know how to channel it and how to own it. So the first step always begins an acceptance of this dock side, whenever you have all of these desires and all of these thoughts, you know, our first reaction to these bad thoughts to these perverse thoughts is, oh my God, this is so bad. Why did I have this thought? But then there is an attitude towards that too. And that attitude you get to choose, how do you respond to the natural reaction that’s even coming to that thought itself. So there’s a negative thought, but then there’s a reaction to the negative thought based on societal conditioning, where you believe it’s right to have this thought, or it’s wrong to have this thought, we’re constantly doing this, by the way, we’re constantly judging whether it’s right or wrong to feel this way, or to think this way, instead of accepting and letting ourselves have this thought or have this feeling, please notice this from day to day in your day-to-day life, right now, just notice whatever feeling and whatever thought comes up and the natural reaction to it.

Quazi (08:02):

What is the natural reaction and how do you feel, how do you even respond to that reaction? This, if you can just do this one thing, if you can, just, instead of judging that natural reaction, even if you can just let that reaction arise and let it pass, you will become the master of your mind. I can promise you that. So from now on, whenever you have a thought that you don’t like or a feeling that you don’t like choose the response that you have to it choose the response that you have to this reaction. And I can promise you if you can just learn to do this and just learn to even watch, you don’t even need to respond to it. Just simply watch the reaction, just silently, watch it without any sort of judgment and see what happens over time. You’re going to be able to take a step back from all of this and choose whichever response, whichever reaction comes up naturally.

Quazi (08:57):

So all of these reactions that are arising right now, then naturally conditioned within our subconscious based on what we’ve seen based on what we’ve heard based on what society told us, when you think of money, and then you feel negative about it. You feel like, oh, no, it’s bad to want it. Oh, no, I can’t have it. That reaction to has been societaly conditioned. I remember I used to have this negative reaction towards money or negative reaction to success. But then over time, when I started to observe and notice this and acknowledge it and accept it, instead of trying to fight it, I was able to choose which reaction I wanted. So now when I think of money and when I think of, you know, wealth, my relationship to money and wealth is completely different from what it used to be before it was scorned, it was like hatred towards it.

Quazi (09:46):

It was anger. Like the world is unfair. Why is it unfair? And now it’s, it’s more of money’s available for everyone. You can have whatever you want. It’s very simple to have what you want, but this wasn’t, it wasn’t like this before it’s been conditioned. This is how I conditioned and programmed myself. And you can do this too. If you simply just start observing acutely observing these natural reactions that are already programmed within you and these natural reactions, they’re just habits. They’re just habits because you’ve been accustomed to feeding, to reacting like this over and over and over again. Okay? So the message of this video really is simple. You know, you have all of these thoughts and desires instead of judging them, just begin by observing and watching them and letting them pass. That’s the first step. And, uh, whatever arises within you, let whatever arises arise and let it pass and run.

Quazi (10:46):

It’s natural course. What we do is I remember I asked this question in a YouTube community, like what drives you? What’s your why? And different people have different whys. I commented that my why was I’d never wanted to be mediocre. I always want it to be exceptional and you know, not waste my potential, this infinite potential. And then someone else also commented that their, why was to be the best right? To beat everyone else and be the best. But then they also added this side comment, which I found very interesting. They said, I know I shouldn’t want this. I know I shouldn’t want this, but what I want is to be the best. Now you can see how this person was judging themselves for wanting what they want. They’re not owning that Dockside. They’re simply reacting negatively to it. Instead if you simply own it and work with it.

Quazi (11:36):

And as you progress and mature in your spiritual journey, your desires get purified. They start to take on a different form. For example, at those lower levels of consciousness, we get motivated by self and personal gain. But over time, what happens is, as you keep going in this spiritual journey, you keep looking within and starting to achieve your goals and starting to see how meaningless and fruitless it is because you know that feeling doesn’t last for too long. Then that realization occurs within you that wait a second, there must be something more. Then you seek something more. But that is a natural course of action. It’s not something you can fake. You can’t tell yourself when you’re poor that, oh, you know, it’s bad to be rich. Get rich first, have the money first. And then you can say that, right? So that’s the point I was trying to make.

Quazi (12:23):

That’s the first key, letting whatever arise, arise, without any sort of judgment. And number two is own your dark side. Don’t let it own you. We let our dark sides own us when we repress and suppress it. When we try to, you know, ignore it or resist it, right. When we try to say, oh, this is wrong. Just stuff it down and just distract ourselves into focusing on something else. When you do that, your dark side starts to get control over you. How our thoughts and feelings work is there. They almost work in multiplication and division. When you tell yourself not to think about something, all you can do is think about that thing. It just keeps getting stronger. The mind is antifragile. Okay. This is a, it’s a book that I read recently by Nassim Nicholas Taleb. And in it, he talks about this concept of fragility is something, you know, you do something to something you give it chaos and it gets an, a deteriorates.

Quazi (13:25):

But what’s the opposite of that. What quality is the opposite of fragility? It’s anti-fragility what can you keep introducing chaos into? But with this chaos, it feeds itself and get stronger. It’s your thoughts? So the mind is antifragile, whatever thoughts and feelings you have. If you keep repressing and suppressing it, it’ll just keep multiplying and dividing and it’ll get stronger and stronger until one day it owns you, but you can own your Dockside by simply accepting and acknowledging its existence and letting it be there and letting it take on the next form when the time is right. So guys with that, I conclude this video. Thank you so much for watching quick recap of what we talked about. Stop judging yourself. You have different sides to you own them, instead of trying to pretend that it’s not their own them and own your desires. Don’t judge your desires.

Quazi (14:14):

If you desire to be the best in the world right now, if you desire to be famous own that desire and channel it into whatever it is you want to channel into. And the two keys that we talked about are number one, whatever’s arising right now, let it arise and simply observe it in neutral attention, whatever reaction you have to, whatever is arising. Even watch that you’re the witness, the silent observer of all of these. You’re not your reaction. You’re not the thought or the feeling number two, own your dark side, and don’t let it own you. There’s no point and doubting and hesitating, whatever, you know, now act with full commitment towards that and know that whatever feedback you need will be given to you in due time. So guys with that, I conclude this video. Thank you so much for watching. And please let me know what you thought of this.

Quazi (15:07):

I just wanted to make this a conversational style video, no whiteboard, no fancy writing. Um, I have my notes over here, obviously, cause I always want to be prepared before sharing something. Maybe that’s me judging myself, but I hope you liked this video. Let me know what you thought of it in the comments. And if you’re new to the channel, make sure you like comment, subscribe and hit that little bell there right now. So you’re notified of every new video that I put out. And if you’d like to work closer together with me and my team for the reality mastery program, you can apply. Now click on the link in the description below to apply now who we typically work with are people who are entrepreneurs and business owners who want to take their businesses to the next level. But what they’re finding is that they don’t have a tactical strategical problem.

Quazi (15:46):

What they have is a mindset problem, an internal problem, you know, they can’t really see themselves making more money and they only believe that they’re worth a certain amount and unconsciously, these hidden beliefs are governing their actions and what they’re able to see, what tactics and strategies they’re even able to see and capitalize on. If that sounds like you click on the link in the description to sign up, let’s see if we can help. And, uh, our free Facebook group is open for you to take advantage of the link for that is also in the description. Guys. Thank you so much for watching till next time.